I’ve been going to counseling for the past couple months.
It’s beautiful and I think we should talk about our bruised minds like we talk about our bruised knees.
Naturally. Unashamedly. And honestly.
I’m learning about humanity right now. I’m teaching my brain it’s Ok to be human. That we make errors and can’t control nearly as much as we think we can or should.
We fall. We fail. We hurt. We ache. And this is what it means to be human.
But what about when we feel like we should be more than human?
What about when the injustice around us or within us begs us to act more than a man could?
Some of us try. I’ve tried. I’ve tried to be stronger, faster, better. I’ve tried to work longer and harder. I’ve tried to make others safe. I’ve tried to make myself safe.
But it’s like hopping in an Ocean and pulling the waves back with a spoon.
We can sweat all we want. We can throw ourselves into the breakers again and again, trying to hold them back with our silver utensil – but they are going to break.
And sometimes they break hard. You’ve probably had a few break hard. You’ve probably seen a few break hard on others. So some of us try. I’ve tried.
Some of us try to ignore them. We sit in the salty water pretending our skin doesn’t ache from the waves. We taste another crushing breaker but tell ourselves we’re fine. We’re fine. They’re fine. People are fine. Because they have to be. We have to be. I have to be. We must be strong. I’ve tried this too.
Both strategies sound brave: “I’m fighting for myself, or others, or the world!” We exclaim in some kind of soldier scream.
But both strategies are actually quite damaging. They damage us. They damage me and you. They damage us because they are unreal. Unreal things make us less human. And some of us want that. And I get that. I do.
But what if humanity means death isn’t the end?
What if having flesh that hurts and heart that can ache means something good?
What if resurrection is real?
Resurrection can sound distant and unattached. The empty tomb can be a historical fact but not a calming voice.
But what if dying things do really produce something in the dirt?
I’m asking myself this. And you this.
I’m asking us to consider that what if when we enter into pain we enter into God country?
What if God meets us here?
What if God specializes in making humans new again?
What if that’s His thing? What if that’s what He loves?
What if the “It is Finished” cry didn’t mean “Pain is over.” but “Pain now has a beautiful purpose?”
What if that cry was a declaration from heaven that said, “There Shall Be No More Purposeless Pain”?
I think that may change things for you and me. I think that may make us eager not dismayed. I think it may give us hope when we see the rolling waves crushing us and those we love.
I think we have a reason to hope.
I think we have a reason to be glad we’re human.
Because God only resurrects human hearts. He stays away from machines.
He didn’t form a robotic mind or steel heart.
He specializes in the surgery you need to be more beautiful than you could ever imagine.
He specializes in humans. He specializes in you and in me.