I’m done God


Done with my hands

They fail

Done acting like prayer is anything less than a declaration that I can’t do this

I can’t. Between regret and hopes and doubt and joy and fear – I can’t.

And you see me – right now as I’m penning these words or as I’m coding these words.

I’m needy. You are God.


I don’t have a list because I don’t know what I need.
So here, hold this real quick and let me just peal back my flesh you patched on me as a boy. There – see all that stuff inside?

Help. I need help with tomorrow, today and my choices of yesterday.

I don’t know. I can’t even ask for the right box because I’m not sure what I need.

I need you – and your peace and your steadfast shoulders.

Catch me.

Catch these peeled back layers.

Catch me.

I’m done – God. Completely done.

This is where you do your best work though – right?

I hope those stories are true about people being at the end and then you made a beginning from the frays of dusk.

I hope but even that’s weak. I’m here – needy, and you’re on high orchestrating mornings and birds and lions food, and new babies.


2 Comments Add yours

  1. Boy, can I relate. You’ve captured the emotion well. Assuming this piece reflects your feelings, you are not alone in your struggle. The truth is hopeful, but it is a painful pursuit. Hang in there, David!


  2. Derek Eitreim says:

    Nice. Raw. Real.

    Derek Eitreim Sent from my iPhone



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