Beneath the Debate

It’s hard to blame the screaming.

Young lives were taken that cold December day in Connecticut. We must expect there to be emotional debate as a result. But will more laws really help?

I understand why many legislators want something in pen, something permanent, and something done. Everyone feels the urge to act. No one wants to wake to another December 14th.  Whether you believe increased gun control laws will work or not, everyone agrees that the killing of children is evil and sickening.

However, even if gun laws help reduce tragic killings, isn’t there a deeper hole in America right now? This devastating day brought with it many questions, but this is perhaps the most important:
Where have all the men gone?
Not boys but men. There are plenty of males roaming the streets here in Washington D.C., and back on Hope’s campus. There are plenty of boys filled with more testosterone than estrogen. However, what makes a man a man is much more than his ability to procreate or grow some facial scruff.
Indeed what makes a man a man is his willingness to sacrifice. The line that separates a boy from a man is covered in our Savior’s blood. We know it’s a hard battle. The first man copped out in the garden and gave into sin. He was passive. Look around. What do you see? I see an increasing number of brave but deeply hurting women. Hurt, a lot of times, by the ‘boys’ in their lives. And it’s not just the women the ‘boys’ are hurting.
Let’s not forget Adam Lanzan. This boy who was deeply hurt by someone who posed as a man: his Father. The only contact Adam had with his Father was an alimony check. Adam was deeply hurt when he destroyed many beautiful lives in Mid-December.
Consider the following stats from the “National Fatherhood Initiative”.
·      A 2002 Department of Justice survey of 7,000 inmates revealed that 39% of jail inmates lived in mother-only households.

·      In a study of INTERPOL crime statistics of 39 countries, it was found that single parenthood ratios were strongly correlated with violent crimes.
·      Children in father-absent homes are almost four times more likely to be poor. In 2011, 12 percent of children in married-couple families were living in poverty, compared to 44 percent of children in mother-only families.
·      Even after controlling for community context, there is significantly more drug use among children who do not live with their mother and father.

I don’t just want healing from this tragic day; I want redemption. Redemption, I believe begins by more men serving instead of satisfying, loving instead of lusting, crying instead of crusting-over, and supporting with their heart instead of their paycheck.
The universe is so vast and so ageless that the life of one man can only be justified by the measure of his sacrifice. -John Eldredge

2 Comments Add yours

  1. Noelle Gable says:

    I was the one that posted under Urban Family not realizing I was signed on that way. My opinion in no way is connected with UFM and their beliefs. This is my opinion and mine alone. Oh yes…. The men… We have become a country who doesnt makes our little boys grow up to men. We as a community need to step up and hold our families accountable for raising their children right. We have stripped all authority from being able to discipline our children and the lack of respect we have for authority is non-existent. Our parents have become parents when they were still children and never forced to grow up. It comes down to men being ken, women being mothers, re-empowering our authority to be authority and becoming a community that says NO MORE ON MY WATCH! I agree… No law or gun control mandate will help. It goes way back farther than that… Engage in life with your children. Know who their friends are, where they are going, when they will be home, set up specific. guidelines for them and make them live by it! A parent is a parent jot a friend. I always tell my kids and the other kids I am around "if you don't like me right now, then I'm being a parent. That's the way I'm supposed to be to help you be an adult later on.". Something has to change or Jesus needs to come back. My heart can't take much more of this constant breaking….


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